As parents, we all want our young adults, our children, to do well in their life and finances. But before we start lecturing or giving advice, let’s remember what we did with our money at their age.
One of the highlights of being a young adult is starting to earn money for the first time – proper money, not just pocket change. But what’s really interesting, at that age, is their discretionary income is really high because actual costs are quite low. Now this can be a huge burden for young people as they try to navigate the world and adopt positive financial habits. But earning an income while actual costs are quite low – for the right family and the right young person – presents a real opportunity.
Many 18-year-olds today earn money and immediately, splash the cash. They go out and start buying whatever catches their eye. In Australia today, two of the biggest expenses are ride shares and food delivery; enter Uber. Isn’t that interesting? Historically, young people walked to see their friends and eating out just wasn’t that common. Today, eating out is just something everyone does, every week; it’s so common and so costly.
Parental Guidance vs Mentorship
Parents often have the desire to help their adult children be smart with their money, to encourage them to start buying assets, like property, as soon as possible. Unfortunately, as our children get older, our influence as parents diminishes. When we start to tell them what they should and shouldn’t be doing with their money, it just becomes another lecture to them.
This is where having a mentor can become really powerful. As part of Teach Me About Property, we assist families to bring their adult children into the property game with them; sometimes we even have one-on-one sessions with the young person. It’s judgment-free, and sometimes young people more easily let down their guard around mentors than they do with their parents. Why? Because they are less worried about how a mentor is going to react. A mentor isn’t the whole solution, but we can be part of an important ongoing conversation and provide direction.
Direction and Purpose
When you speak with young people, many are willing to save money, but only if they know what it is they are saving for. Without purpose, people spend instead of saving. At Teach Me About Property, we refer back to Simon Sinek’s book ‘Start With Why’; in life, just as in business, knowing your ‘why’ or your purpose can be game changing. Remember, it’s easy to spend money when it doesn’t have a purpose.
With direction, you can more easily switch on the hustle. This is what we want from our children when they’re moving into adulthood – we want them to make wise financial decisions.
To switch on financially, young people need direction and guidance. The cool thing is, when we’ve worked with young adults at Teach Me About Property, we’ve been able to help them set clear and realistic goals, sometimes bigger than they had conceived – and 9/10 all they want to do is crush it as fast as possible.
Young people, especially today, have a drive, they have hustle, but it is up to us as parents and mentors to gear that hustle towards accumulation, first cash and then assets. The challenge to flip the switch is difficult, but rewarding.
Igniting the Inner Fire
Inward desire is crucial – your adult children has to want it. You can’t want it for them, more than they want it for themselves. That won’t work. If you’ve got kids, and you want them to be financially smart, but they don’t want that, it isn’t gonna work. You’ve got to learn to turn on the fire inside of them.
This is what we talk about when we discuss two things: multi-generational change and how a changed life changes lives. When a parent owns property, the children are far more likely to own property, and their grandchildren far more likely still. That’s multi-generational change.
But we also talk about how a changed life changes lives, at TMAP. As a parent, you can’t just lecture; you’ve got to do it. They’ve got to see you doing it. And then, you have to give them the freedom to make the same mistakes that you made. You have to give them the freedom to try things. One day they may go, “Oh, you know what? I should have listened to you.” You have to give them that freedom of expression. That’s when they become more receptive.
Conclusion
If you’re just forcing your young people to do the things you want them to do, and they lack the inward desire, that desire leaves when you leave the room. So what we’re trying to do to change lives for the next generation is to light that inner desire.
When their thoughts change, their speech changes, their behaviour changes, their outcomes change – everything changes.